Tom Sietsema's Online Chat

[The Hersch]

At the end of today's chat:

In the meantime, eat well and be well.

He's borrowed Kliman's sign-off!

[dcs]

Hook was the latest to be in the firing line in today's chat. Granted I have only been once, but my experience was certainly not the same. I certainly don't recall the prices being way out of line for DC, forget GT.

What is the "prosecco pitch?" Do they merely suggest you might enjoy a bottle of sparkling wine?

[giant shrimp]

Hook was the latest to be in the firing line in today's chat. Granted I have only been once, but my experience was certainly not the same. I certainly don't recall the prices being way out of line for DC, forget GT.

tom says he heard about the prosecco upsell and "what a shame." i agree it probably should be ditched, but it hit me as more of a suggestion than an indication that the restaurant was pouncing to make an extra buck at the earliest opportunity. (or maybe i was born yesterday.)

the first mention of hook today was favorable, and tom responded with a slam: "Finally, something interesting in Georgetown, huh?" so i would say his slant on the restaurant is ambivalent at this point. he was hearing good things about it last week. this week the food is "bland."

the food at hook was also bland yesterday, and todd kliman said it first: "The food is light, clean, impeccably and imaginatively sourced, aesthetically pleasing, and -- as my recent first peek showed -- unaccountably bland." the author uses literary device well, but i think he is not entirely correct about this being a place where people are coming to be seen rather than to eat. and his description of the chef is on the mean side: "he looks like a prep-school kid who's just ditched his uniform." i am assuming, however, that his intent was to be humorous.

[dcs]

tom says he heard about the prosecco upsell and "what a shame." i agree it probably should be ditched, but it hit me as more of a suggestion than an indication that the restaurant was pouncing to make an extra buck at the earliest opportunity. (or maybe i was born yesterday.)

Oddly, the prosecco seems to be among the least expensive sparkling wines offered by Hook:

http://www.hookdc.com/wine-list.php

If they were really trying to squeeze the last dollar out of customers through an impulse order, they probably would have chosen a somewhat pricier alternative. Perhaps they are meaning to showcase what a "bargain" the prosecco is?

[TedE]

P.S. The Hook also got RIDICULOUSLY loud as they ushered a happy hour party into the bangettes near my friend and I in the window

When I was waiting tables there was a particularly cozy booth that was used as a bangette on a number of occasions after closing ...

[Heather]

OK, Hook's food is salty AND bland?

The snippet Mike posted from Jonathan Gold over in the deviled eggs thread reminded me of the Hook comments in Tom's chat:

And Americans, as many were quick to note, like big flavors. “People expect the slap in the face of truffle oil,” said Jonathan Gold, the restaurant critic for LA Weekly. “They have lost their taste for subtlety; they want bigger than life flavors that are amped up with aromatics. That’s American cooking at the moment.”

Whenever I hear a dish described as "bland," I wonder whether it actually needed seasoning or whether it just wasn't tarted up enough for our jaded, overseasoned palates. Why would a seafood place emphasizing the pristine quality of its wares be interested in tarting it up?

[mdt]

OK, Hook's food is salty AND bland?

The snippet Mike posted from Jonathan Gold over in the deviled eggs thread reminded me of the Hook comments in Tom's chat:Whenever I hear a dish described as "bland," I wonder whether it actually needed seasoning or whether it just wasn't tarted up enough for our jaded, overseasoned palates. Why would a seafood place emphasizing the pristine quality of its wares be interested in tarting it up?

Exactly! I found the dishes at Hook to be well prepared, but I am a friend of JG so what do I know?

[dmwine]

OK, Hook's food is salty AND bland?

The snippet Mike posted from Jonathan Gold over in the deviled eggs thread reminded me of the Hook comments in Tom's chat:Whenever I hear a dish described as "bland," I wonder whether it actually needed seasoning or whether it just wasn't tarted up enough for our jaded, overseasoned palates. Why would a seafood place emphasizing the pristine quality of its wares be interested in tarting it up?

Gold's quote applies to American tastes in wine, too ... but then, you almost need a tarted-up wine to pair with the tarted-up food ...

[Heather]

I should qualify that I was speaking of "bland" with no other adjectives or explanation, like "undersalted" or "needs acid as a counterpoint" or pointing out that the seafood itself lacked flavor.

[jpschust]

Oddly, the prosecco seems to be among the least expensive sparkling wines offered by Hook:

http://www.hookdc.com/wine-list.php

If they were really trying to squeeze the last dollar out of customers through an impulse order, they probably would have chosen a somewhat pricier alternative. Perhaps they are meaning to showcase what a "bargain" the prosecco is?

it might be the least expensive but it might be a large source of profit based on markup...that said I don't think it would really bother me if a waiter tried to push prosecco. Not my favorite sparkling in the world, but I'll drink it.

[Banco]

OK, Hook's food is salty AND bland?

The snippet Mike posted from Jonathan Gold over in the deviled eggs thread reminded me of the Hook comments in Tom's chat:Whenever I hear a dish described as "bland," I wonder whether it actually needed seasoning or whether it just wasn't tarted up enough for our jaded, overseasoned palates. Why would a seafood place emphasizing the pristine quality of its wares be interested in tarting it up?

To be read in the voice of Jack Nicholson in "The Shining": "Words of wisdom, Lloyd, words of wisdom!"--which you absolutely do not need to qualify as you do up thread. It's observations like yours that make me happy and honored to be on this board, if I may say so.

[Waitman]

Oddly, the prosecco seems to be among the least expensive sparkling wines offered by Hook:

http://www.hookdc.com/wine-list.php

If they were really trying to squeeze the last dollar out of customers through an impulse order, they probably would have chosen a somewhat pricier alternative. Perhaps they are meaning to showcase what a "bargain" the prosecco is?

Bottled water is a lot cheaper than prosecco but it's still annoying to get hit with an upsell no matter how little cash it's trying to take out of your pocket. Not that Hook is necessarily upselling (I haven't been), but the prosecco offer, regardless of intent, appears to be rubbing people the wrong way. Any one whose been there noticed parallel pressures for desserts and sparkling water?

it might be the least expensive but it might be a large source of profit based on markup...that said I don't think it would really bother me if a waiter tried to push prosecco. Not my favorite sparkling in the world, but I'll drink it.

A quick Google suggests retail at $13-15/bottle. To me that suggests a more-or-less standard markup.

[jpschust]

Bottled water is a lot cheaper than prosecco but it's still annoying to get hit with an upsell no matter how little cash it's trying to take out of your pocket. Not that Hook is necessarily upselling (I haven't been), but the prosecco offer, regardless of intent, appears to be rubbing people the wrong way. Any one whose been there noticed parallel pressures for desserts and sparkling water?

A quick Google suggests retail at $13-15/bottle. To me that suggests a more-or-less standard markup.

Could be, couldn't be. Who knows how much they are paying for it...(jake might, but google just isn't an effective tool for this). In any event, if it's driving your customer base away you should probably stop it, but it sounds like such a minor thing in the grand scheme of a new place.

[Pat]

I like the way he ended today's chat. [to wit: "I look forward to seeing you (well, MOST of you!) next week."] . Questions about his objectivity are getting really old. What exactly is he supposed to say?

[monavano]

I like the way he ended today's chat. [to wit: "I look forward to seeing you (well, MOST of you!) next week."] . Questions about his objectivity are getting really old. What exactly is he supposed to say?

I was thinking the same thing. It must be tough to have his integrity impugned like that, and have to go on the defense when he obviously works so hard.

[jpschust]

I agree- while I mostly disagree with his reviews I don't see it as an issue of a lack of integrity, but rather a different set of tastes and a differing approach to reviewing than suit me.

[blakegwinn]

I like the way he ended today's chat. [to wit: "I look forward to seeing you (well, MOST of you!) next week."] . Questions about his objectivity are getting really old. What exactly is he supposed to say?

I have a feeling this is the same person(s) every week. A poorly reviewed owner/chef? A "maligned" diner on a personal PR vendetta against a restaurant that got a glowing review from Tom and thus destroying his efforts to single-handedly put the place out of business? Jilted ex-lover (perhaps the restaurant industry person he was accused of dating in the chat?)

[Waitman]

hmmm....

I try really hard to separate the personal from the professional, but there IS in fact a restaurant with an employee who posted something so awful (and untrue) about me online that I'm disinclined to return. But you know what? The job of a critic is to transcend personal taste (and feeling). So I'll be back -- and open of mind.

[Heather]

Anyone ordering a drink called a "buttery nipple" deserves to be soaked for $250.

And Bart Seaver is single...

[Waitman]

Anyone ordering a drink called a "buttery nipple" deserves to be soaked for $250.

On a similar note, anyone (besides a Mexican) who proposes in a Mexican restaurant deserves to sleep with his hand that night.

"We'll always have The Rio Grande Cafe."

ETA: I'm guessing that if he reccomends Casa Oaxaca twice in a chat, the forthcoming review will be pretty good.

[Pat]

One of the things I like about Tom's chat is when he gets a question clearly not intended for him but answers it anyway .

[monavano]

Anyone ordering a drink called a "buttery nipple" deserves to be soaked for $250.

And Bart Seaver is single...

I really wanted to know what restaurant this was. They deserved to be hosed, then flogged with the hose. Any educated guesses as to the name of the establishment?

[JPW]

I really wanted to know what restaurant this was. They deserved to be hosed, then flogged with the hose. Any educated guesses as to the name of the establishment?

Fuddruckers

[jpschust]

Clyde's.

[Al Dente]

Hooters!

[Drive-by Critic]

Hooters!

Hmmm. Here's the only hint I culd find in the post: "popular Chinatown restaurant."

[Al Dente]

Hmmm. Here's the only hint I culd find in the post: "popular Chinatown restaurant."

Are you suggesting Hooters is not a popular Chinatown restaurant?

[The Hersch]

On a similar note, anyone (besides a Mexican) who proposes in a Mexican restaurant deserves to sleep with his hand that night.

To be fair, he wanted a Mexican restaurant "close to a park or bridge near the water", the latter being the locale of his intended question-popping. Still sounds like a loser, though.

[Heather]

That guy should have dinner at Oyamel, then walk down to the Smithsonian sculpture garden or the garden at the Hirschorn.

[Mark Slater]

Hmmm. Here's the only hint I culd find in the post: "popular Chinatown restaurant."

Clyde's, Hooters, Fuddruckers are all bars that are acquainted with shooters and would never charge $28 each. Sounds like a Chinese restaurant to me.

[The Hersch]

Clyde's, Hooters, Fuddruckers are all bars that are acquainted with shooters and would never charge $28 each. Sounds like a Chinese restaurant to me.

How many staff at Chinese restaurants in Chinatown would say "Jesus F...ing Christ"?

[Waitman]

How many staff at Chinese restaurants in Chinatown would say "Jesus F...ing Christ"?

And how many Chinese restaurants serve buttery nipples?

I'm guessing Poste (maybe I was there on a bad night) or maybe Indibleu, one of those places that, at certain times becomes heavily be-wankered and the drinks become more important than the food. What's that place next to the Spy Museum?

[monavano]

And how many Chinese restaurants serve buttery nipples?

I'm guessing Poste (maybe I was there on a bad night) or maybe Indibleu, one of those places that, at certain times becomes heavily be-wankered and the drinks become more important than the food. What's that place next to the Spy Museum?

Zola

[mdt]

And how many Chinese restaurants serve buttery nipples?

I'm guessing Poste (maybe I was there on a bad night) or maybe Indibleu, one of those places that, at certain times becomes heavily be-wankered and the drinks become more important than the food. What's that place next to the Spy Museum?

Poste and Zola in Chinatown? That is stretching it a bit isn't it?

Matchbox?

[Drive-by Critic]

Sounds like its time for a new DR game - figure out the restaurants nailed in the Sietsema chat. This one should be great fun. Form a posse, and visit all the restaurants in Chinatown. At each one, order a buttery nipple and see how much you are charged. Last one standing is...well, I guess there won't be anyone standing at the end of this game.

Puking, yes. Standing, no. Talk about taking one for the team. This drink sounds Serious nondrinker's drink. Nondrinking chick drink And to think that you would have to drink a dozen or more. Doubt it was Hooters. The waitress would only have to bend over the table a couple of times to get these guys to forget all about checking the tab.

Ellen

[Waitman]

Poste and Zola in Chinatown? That is stretching it a bit isn't it?

Matchbox?

I go by closest Metro stop.

[Heather]

Sounds like its time for a new DR game - figure out the restaurants nailed in the Sietsema chat. This one should be great fun. Form a posse, and visit all the restaurants in Chinatown. At each one, order a buttery nipple and see how much you are charged. Last one standing is...well, I guess there won't be anyone standing at the end of this game.

No thanks.

Perhaps it's just the second wave feminist rising within me, but I don't see a table full of women ordering a drink called a buttery nipple. Sounds more like a mixed party or bachelor party - a more be-wankered grouping, if you will.

[monavano]

Sounds like its time for a new DR game - figure out the restaurants nailed in the Sietsema chat. This one should be great fun. Form a posse, and visit all the restaurants in Chinatown. At each one, order a buttery nipple and see how much you are charged. Last one standing is...well, I guess there won't be anyone standing at the end of this game.

Puking, yes. Standing, no. Talk about taking one for the team. This drink sounds Serious nondrinker's drink. Nondrinking chick drink And to think that you would have to drink a dozen or more. Doubt it was Hooters. The waitress would only have to bend over the table a couple of times to get these guys to forget all about checking the tab.

Ellen

I bet it was guys, so they could say "nipple" repeatedy. It reminds me of an all time favorite tv series, "Northern Exposure". One episode revolved around birding the elusive titmouse bird. Tit...hehe. They said that word a LOT.

[The Hersch]

I go by closest Metro stop.

No one in his right mind (hm, that might undermine my point) would refer to Zola as a Chinatown restaurant. How about PS7?

[lackadaisi]

No thanks.

Perhaps it's just the second wave feminist rising within me, but I don't see a table full of women ordering a drink called a buttery nipple. Sounds more like a mixed party or bachelor party - a more be-wankered grouping, if you will.

I have, unfortunately, been at many gatherings - not recently - in which buttery nipples were involved. I have never seen them ordered by a guy - unless it was in hopes of getting laid by the girl for whom he was ordering.

(as shots of that sort go - which isn't ever good - the buttery nipple is really not a bad option; but, I would urge all bartenders to ID those drinking them)

Edited to note that if you are ordering 9 buttery nipples, you probably don't go out enough to differentiate between Chinatown, Gallery Place, and Penn Quarter (and, you certainly don't live there). My bet is on Clyde's.

[Drive-by Critic]

I bet it was guys, so they could say "nipple" repeatedy. It reminds me of an all time favorite tv series, "Northern Exposure". One episode revolved around birding the elusive titmouse bird. Tit...hehe. They said that word a LOT.

Who can reply to this one the fastest, me or mktye? Now you are on MY turf - the birding listservs periodically break into silly discussions of TITillating bird names. There are lots of tits - Blue Tit, Great Tit, Penduline Tit....and then there's Oxpecker, woodpecker, Cock of the Rock, various boobies....

Now, how to tie this back to food and restaurants? Well, we eat food before and after birding...Um, OK, that's really lame, I know.

[monavano]

Who can reply to this one the fastest, me or mktye? Now you are on MY turf - the birding listservs periodically break into silly discussions of TITillating bird names. There are lots of tits - Blue Tit, Great Tit, Penduline Tit....and then there's Oxpecker, woodpecker, Cock of the Rock, various boobies....

Now, how to tie this back to food and restaurants? Well, we eat food before and after birding...Um, OK, that's really lame, I know.

Why just today I saw 3 kinds of peckers. Downy, red bellied and hairy. Umm.....hairy.....

Anyways....back to nipples.

[The Hersch]

From today's chat, a diner upset by a child in a restaurant:

Voices were raised and I told them to keep their little brat home if he couldn't eat dinner without having to use a DVD. We almost came to blows. I'm glad to report that I ruined their dinner.

While I've certainly been annoyed by children in restaurants, I'd like to think I'm not a total asshole like this poster. Although this was posted anonymously, the tone indicates to me that this guy (it simply cannot be a woman) would have signed his name if he'd thought of it. Sheesh.

[jm chen]

I interpreted that one as a "joke."

[The Hersch]

I interpreted that one as a "joke."

That never occurred to me, actually, and having gone back and re-read it, it still doesn't occur to me. You could still be right, of course.

[starfish]

I interpreted that one as a "joke."

i too read that as a joke, a poorly written joke, but a joke nonetheless.

[Stretch]

From the department of oh-yeah-it-was-totally-their-fault-dude:

Washington, D.C.: I went to Farrah Olivia last week and ordered the pork tenderloin and the waiter asked me how I wanted it done. I thought pork was like chicken and had to be cooked all the way through. I asked for it well done. Anyhow,it was rubbery and flavorless and I couldn't eat it. I get the feeling that restaurants during RW make ahead the three dishes they will offer and they sit under a heat lamp in the kitchen for too long...

[Pat]

From the department of oh-yeah-it-was-totally-their-fault-dude:

When I saw the comparison to chicken, I wondered if this person had ever been asked in a restaurant how he (?) wanted his chicken cooked.

[monavano]

I would like to think that the chatter who took phantom phone reservations was kidding, but I don't think he was.

[JPW]

I would like to think that the chatter who took phantom phone reservations was kidding, but I don't think he was.

For a while, we had the number formerly belonging to one Jose Oliver. We got at least one call a day from process servers and debt collectors for months. Especially annoying as some people would call and say that they were looking for "Joe". I'm not saying that I approve, but I completely understand.