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Soccer for Dummies


DonRocks

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Okay, I want to learn about soccer, from the ground up. I know a *little* bit, but barely a little - I'm not even sure I can name all the positions. 

Does anyone have any websites or reference material that will take me from ... assume zero just to be safe ... to something of a mastery, in an easy progression? I'm a very, very quick study, but I'd like to know some fundamentals before I get into this thread. I'm also more interested in a world view than a national view (although I would like to know how the U.S. is progressing at some point, too).

Can anyone list a few websites, from absolute beginner, to intermediate, to advanced? Not tutorials per se, but after I know the rules, for example, an intermediate video might compare and contrast the skills of Pele and Maradona, and maybe one day I'll understand why Messi is considered better than they were (although I've heard people say Maradona was the bomb-diggity)..

Thanks if you can point me in the right direction. I would also appreciate something similar for hockey (lovehockey?), which can go in its own "Hockey for Dummies" thread - in case anyone thinks I'm cocky, let these be two direct contradictions to that thought: I am as ignorant as any sports fan can possibly be about these two sports - I've even been to several Caps games and loved them; I just don't know *why*.

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I think it's hard to watch a sport unless you have a rooting interest.  So you have to start by picking which team(s) to support.  There are many soccer leagues, so it is not inconceivable to support more than 1 team (heck, I root for 4 NFL teams).

The two best leagues right now are the English Premier League and La Liga.  EPL is the most flushed with cash from their tv deal, which gets spread to all 20 teams in the top tier.  So even a crappy Premier League team is still loaded, compared to teams in other leagues.  While there is no salary cap in EPL (but there is something called financial fair play, but how it works and whether it works is beyond me), because the teams have cash, they all can afford to buy talent from other leagues, thus you have more parity in EPL.  Currently, the EPL has a top 5 or 6 - Chelsea, Man United, Man City, Arsenal, Liverpool and Tottenham.  If you like to cheer on a winning team, pick from one of those. 

La Liga is dominated by 2 super teams - Real Madrid and Barcelona.  Use to be, Real and Barca has their own tv deal.  Now, I think La Liga has a league deal, but Real and Barca gets a much larger piece of the pie.  That and their historical success have kept those clubs rich, and the best players in the world want to join them to get  the chance to win the Champions League.  If you like to cheer on a winning, you'd pick one of them.

Each of Bundesliga and Ligue Une is dominated by a single team.  Serie A is known as a more defensive league.  Frankly, between the EPL, La Liga, and Champions League, that's more soccer than I can watch. 

The only rule you really need to understand is the offside rule. 

Commentators often talk about position number - so you might want to know what number represent what position. 

 

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1 hour ago, Ericandblueboy said:

I think it's hard to watch a sport unless you have a rooting interest.  So you have to start by picking which team(s) to support.  There are many soccer leagues, so it is not inconceivable to support more than 1 team (heck, I root for 4 NFL teams).

Well, I don't really have a favorite tennis player, but that's my favorite sport to watch. (Of course, I used to be a competitive player myself - and would love to be again one day ... if only - so that might help.)

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11 hours ago, DanielK said:

Don, happy to meet you to watch a game on the tube together any time. That's the best way to learn. Or come with me to RFK - I have season tickets.

If you haven't played this is absolutely the best way to learn abt the sport.  Go to United games.  It's good quality and accompanying someone who knows the sport and players will provide insights and things to watch out for that you wouldn't catch on your own.

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14 hours ago, DanielK said:

Don, happy to meet you to watch a game on the tube together any time. That's the best way to learn. Or come with me to RFK - I have season tickets.

2 hours ago, DaveO said:

If you haven't played this is absolutely the best way to learn abt the sport.  Go to United games.  It's good quality and accompanying someone who knows the sport and players will provide insights and things to watch out for that you wouldn't catch on your own.

You know, when I was in my mid-20s, I made the same decision about art. I didn't know *squat*, but for several years I worked one mile away from the National Gallery, and they had lectures on one work of art (the docent's choice) every single week from 12-12:30 or so. I started going, and slowly started learning, one piece of art at a time - after about five years, I had attended about 250 lectures, not to mention having had gone to many exhibits, and I was really becoming quite knowledgeable. Then that knowledge snowballed over the decades - I can honestly say now that, while not an "expert," I probably know more than 99.9% of the general population - all because I did essentially what you're recommending here. I did the same thing with French, opera (which I finally decided I just don't love), and various other pursuits - wines and restaurants, too; ironically, cooking has not been one of them, and I quite literally do not know how to boil an egg (I don't know the minutes required for various levels of doneness).

Immersion is the best way, as long as it's not so overwhelming that you lose hope (that's exactly why I haven't learned Mandarin - I'm so intimidated by it that I render it hopeless in the course of my lifetime, given all the other things I try to do).

Then again, here is what sits in my on-deck circle when it comes to reading - the three English-language books that scare me the most ... three pages of each book, each day, accompanied by memorizing three new words of Spanish each day. I'll finish all three books within a year or so after I start, and I'll be nearly fluent in Spanish in about five years.

Thanks for the offer, and the confirmation of its validity - I think I'll take Daniel up on this.

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Don, I agree that if you want to learn about the game the fastest way to do so is to watch with people who know what they're talking about.  I may have taught a few people about hockey this way....  As well, it also helps a lot to be in an environment where everyone around is into it.

While I watched my brothers play soccer back when we were kids, my first real live soccer experience was at Stamford Bridge, the home of Chelsea.  I went on vacation to England and decided that I wanted to experience theater on the pitch instead of the stage.  That being said, I had a good idea of how things worked but didn't know all of the rules, particularly offside. 

I was able to get a seat to a Chelsea home game for a League Cup fixture (game) against West Ham United (October 27, 2004).  Since it was not an EPL fixture there were season ticket holders who gave their seats back to the club to sell, which is now I ended up with a fantastic seat in the middle of the field, 20-odd rows up.  The fans around me figured out pretty fast I wasn't a local.  They were more than happy to answer any of my "What just happened?" questions.  The crowd was very much part of the whole experience, and I got wrapped up in it. 

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More on watching/learning soccer:  A little background first.

I grew up playing soccer in an American soccer playing town.   Actually that isn't quite accurate as I learned later on.  I really started playing in junior high then played in high school, college, and in various leagues, often and primarily in ethnic (American/European) amateur soccer leagues.  The natives of those lands GREW UP playing soccer.  Not I or my native American peers.  We were playing baseball or football, skating and hockey or basketball at early ages.  Those guys I played with in ethnic leagues grew up playing soccer at their earliest years.  Big difference.  Their individual and team skills were far superior to the skills my townmates, other native Americans, or I had.  It was how we "natives" dramatically improved and got "smarter".  We played with players far superior to us both with regard to individual skills and the awareness and smarts that make the game "the beautiful game".

I learned how to play the team game in offense and defense in those leagues as was promised by my high school coach and the hometown kids older than me also promised.

Watching the team game heightens one's appreciation of the raw sport, IMHO.  After all there are often few scores (goals).  A team can dominate the ball and game and yet lose to a team with great goal playing.  The game can go on for 90 flowing minutes with only one score.  But if you appreciate the flow, teamwork and skills its ever more interesting and exciting.  

Also Eric's suggestion of choosing some favorite teams may have merit.  I don't follow European soccer as do some others with far more knowledge, but occasionally watch games by choice or happenstance.   At some of those times if I'm in a soccer bar with fans of one team it appears their "watching" is more enhanced than mine.  That might improve the learning and watching experience.  The Euro leagues are the Major Major leagues of soccer with the greatest skills and most extraordinary players.  I used to watch the local United with some frequency.  Good league with good players and skills, but its not the Euro leagues. 

Anyway I'd watch games with knowledgeable people.  Its the only real way to learn and appreciate the game.

 

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English Premier League teams to support (in order of current league position on 3/14/2017)

Chelsea F.C.:  The fashionable club of London, which everyone else hates.  Recent league power, especially after the team was bought by Russian oligarch Roman Abramovich.  Currently sitting 10 points clear at the top of the table, they are the odds-on favorite to win the Premier League this year.  

Tottenham Hotspurs:  Chronic underachievers.  Guaranteed to break your heart year-after-year.  Bitter rivalry with Arsenal, who seem to edge them each year (see St. Totteringham's Day)  

Manchester City:  Historically Manchester's other club.  Have been a league power since their purchase by the Abu Dhabi United Group.

Liverpool FC:  Glory club of the 1970s and 1980s, when they won 11 league titles and 7 European trophies.  Have struggled to crack into the elite in recent years, generally finishing on the outside looking in. Bitter rivalry with Manchester United and the city of Liverpool's other club, Everton.   

Arsenal:  The other fashionable London club.  Led by legendary coach Arsene Wenger  who is known for developing young talent and playing stylish attacking soccer, often to their own detriment.  Played dominant soccer during the late 90s-early 00s, but recently known for their stumbles and underachieving.  Usually finish in the Top 4 and make the Champions League (where they chronically fail).      

Manchester United:  The Yankees of English soccer.  Everyone hates them but they keep on winning.  Facing a recent slump after the retirement of legendary coach Sir Alex Ferguson.  Bitter rivalry with Liverpool and their noisy neighbor Man City.

Everton:  Usually finishes the Best of the Rest behind the Top Six.  In recent years has developed a strong following in the U.S. due to fielding several U.S. National Team players (most notably goalkeeper Tim Howard from 2006-2016).  Doesn't invest the money to be an elite club.

The Rest:  The rest of the league seems content to battle it out for mid-table finishes and avoiding relegation.  Every couple of years a team makes a run (see Leicester City) with hopes of making the Champions League or Europa League , but in general, no one challenges the big money clubs above.      

 

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