Monica Bhide Needs Help

[Scott Johnston]

All:

Many of you know our fellow member Monica Bhide, author and literary coach. Last January, her world drastically changed when her husband suffered some medical issues and Monica had to start to care for him full time. She could use our support through a gofundme page that has been set up. I would appreciate if you could help with her support.

https://www.gofundme.com/inspiration-through-tragedy

thanks

Scott J

[DonRocks]

Scott, thank you for posting this - I moved it into the DC Restaurant forum for now to maximize leverage.

Almost 12 years ago, Cathal Armstrong sounded a clarion call for an Easton farm that was in imminent danger. Through this website, and the leadership of one very dedicated member (Camille-Beau), we were able to rally the community, a chain reaction was set off, and the farm was saved.

My single biggest regret, as donrockwell.com has matured, is the loss of community we had when it was founded. As our original members moved on with their lives, they were replaced by newer members who didn't know each other in person, and this website went from being a genuine virtual community to something more of a resource. For several years, I fought this erosion tooth-and-nail, before finally giving up and accepting reality.

However, there have been numerous times when disasters have struck, and people here have always rallied when help is genuinely needed - this is one of those times, and I'm asking the DC restaurant community to step in and give Monica and her family a hand up in this time of genuine need.

Whenever I'm asked to help someone, I have a very simple litmus test: "Would they do it for me?" Three days before our marriage, my soon-to-be wife and I were seated in front of a cancer doctor, and were told that she was going to die - this came completely out of the blue, materializing in a matter of days, all because she had a slight sore throat, didn't want to be sick for her wedding, and said to the doctor, "Oh, by the way, as long as I'm here, I've had this 'puffy feeling' lately ...."

Although this is an entirely different situation, the basics are the same: "Would she do it for you?" In both cases, the answer is, "Yes." Even if she barely knew you, Monica Bhide would step up and help you.

Being a caregiver is a job that I hope you never have, because it's the hardest, most stressful, most exhausting thing that can happen to someone. Even the happiest moments are tinted gray with uncertainty, and you become very well-acquainted with "emergencies within an emergency." And yet, you have to keep your mouth shut and go on, because no matter how hellish your life has become, there is one other person - a person you love - who has it worse than you do. There are no awards for being a martyr, no trophy presentations; just endless worry, stress, and exhaustion, and no matter how tired you are, you have to get up the next morning and do it again - sometimes at 2 AM.

None of this even considers that there are two children in the equation. Any good parent would do whatever they could possibly do for their children - I would, you would, and the sad reality is that many, perhaps most, of us are going to be in a similar situation to this one day. 

There are times in life - thankfully not many - when you simply need help from other people, and you cannot get by without it. This is one of those times, and there is no shame in being randomly placed in a situation that you can't escape from on your own. 

Unlike my story, which had no possibility of a happy ending, Monica's problem has a solution. No, it won't undo what has happened, but it will take an impossibly difficult situation, and make it seem a lot less impossible.

To the entire DC restaurant community: please click on this link, and give whatever you can. Even five dollars is infinitely better than nothing, and the power of social-media amplification can take small amounts, and turn them into a large amount. In many ways, I've been there, and I know much of what Monica is going through - even though you stay strong, carry on, and count your blessings where you can find them, it's a living hell, and having crushingly stressful financial worries mitigated is one of the greatest gifts someone in her situation could possibly receive.