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Cat Butt In My Face


Michael Landrum
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Since so often restaurant professionals are here to give you all advice on our world, and since so many of us, me most obviously first, have no clue as to things in the real world, I was wondering if any of you could help me with a seemingly insurmountable problem I am dealing with now in return.

I am currently cat-sitting a perfectly charming feline who, when not bringing me various bird and rodent remains in tribute, seems to think that relentlessly putting his butt in my face is his life's mission.

Does anyone know a way, without hurting his feelings or making him suck the life force out of me while I sleep, to make him stop? Can anyone at least tell me just to ease my mind--as I lay dying and gasping for breath--whether, in his mind, this is a good thing?

Do I need to mention I am desperate for an answer?

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Since so often restaurant professionals are here to give you all advice on our world, and since so many of us, me most obviously first, have no clue as to things in the real world, I was wondering if any of you could help me with a seemingly insurmountable problem I am dealing with now in return.

I am currently cat-sitting a perfectly charming feline who, when not bringing me various bird and rodent remains in tribute, seems to think that relentlessly putting his butt in my face is his life's mission.

Does anyone know a way, without hurting his feelings or making him suck the life force out of me while I sleep, to make him stop? Can anyone at least tell me just to ease my mind--as I lay dying and gasping for breath--whether, in his mind, this is a good thing?

Do I need to mention I am desperate for an answer?

Probably because you're a known felanaling, and you've done far too much "cat sitting" in the past.

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OK, OK, assuming that Landrum actually has a problem and that everyone else has had his fun, there are two known ways to get a cat to leave you alone:

1. Get a spray bottle full of water and spritz the cat. We have one and every time I get out the ironing board, our cat is perplexed at what that lump of cloth did to deserve such a punishment; and

2. Hiss loudly at the cat. This works wonderfully to confuse the little darling, since the cat hisses at whoever to leave him/her alone. This will actually work if you aren't in a position to grab a spray bottle. And, it costs nothing and doesn't actually harm the cat.

Thank you. I won't go into Dame Edna's rather inappropriate and X-rated comments on this thread.

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Michael, he is interested in you, and he figures you are interested in him, so he is givng you his butt so you can sniff his glands. Pretend to sniff him...you can sniff to the side :angry: and then rub his back muscles for him.... You should be honored he likes you!

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Okay, quick poll before Don locks or deletes this thread.

What is more disturbing?:

A ) That this thread even exists.

B ) That "cat glands" are mentioned and Dean immediately pulls out a link to a song about "cat love glands" as though he had been waiting for the subject to come up all along, which, no doubt, one day it must.

C ) That "B" surprises no-one.

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Okay, quick poll before Don locks or deletes this thread.

What is more disturbing?:

A ) That this thread even exists.

B ) That "cat glands" are mentioned and Dean immediately pulls out a link to a song about "cat love glands" as though he had been waiting for the subject to come up all along, which, no doubt, one day it must.

C ) That "B" surprises no-one.

Sir.... You're reaction humbles me.... at least I can get away saying that to folk who don't know me.....

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I see that this thread is 2 days old, but on the chance that this is still an issue:

With some cats, if you have the fortitude for it, blowing hard on the nether regions when they are presented will annoy the cat & cause it to move away. (ETA: I see that a version of this approach has already been mentioned with the gas duster suggestion. Mine at least has the virtue of being cheaper & not requiring a trip to the store.)

Unfortunately, since some cats pretend to have short attention spans, this is rarely a permanent solution. (This principle also applies to the water-spritz method.)

I have one cat on whom this does not work. She insists on shoving her butt in my face when I nap. My choices are to toss her to the floor, which I am loathe to do, or to turn her sideways & attempt to hold her in place, which generally results in a lengthy struggle.

There's no sure-fire, one-size-fits-all solution that I know.

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