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As I was participating in Happy Hour yesterday at Liberty Tavern, the name of one of the beers on offer caught my eye: "Faceplant". I asked Bobby the vivacious bartender if that was an actual beer or just a joke and she said, it was a real beer. Got me to thinking how over the years makers of alcholic beverages have endeavored to market their product, and how we are now entering the age of extremes in an effort to capture market share -- especially in the booming sector of micro brews.

So let's get our Rockwellian Brains fired up and suggest some names that need to have a brew attached to them. I'll start...:

"Puke on My Shoes"

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Dogfish Head's "Golden Shower" is undoubtedly the greatest beer name ever to (temporarily) sneak past the censors. I still have the bottle label somewhere.

Lagunitas got rejected with "The Kronik" (toned down from "The Chronic", but still rejected) with their copper ale. They just slapped a big CENSORED over the name on the label and continue to sell it that way.

The late 80's/early 90's malt liquor ABV wars brought us some short-lived brand names until the feds legislated them into oblivion. "PowerMaster", anyone? Citation needed, but I think this is actually the reason that there is federal law against alcoholic beverage names directly or obliquely referencing their potency. I'm actually surprised that "Faceplant" made the cut. Is it draft-only? As long as their are no bottle labels for retail I think that is OK.

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