B.A.R.

I glanced at this thread yesterday, and there have been some redactions. Not sure why. At any rate, I had a different experience than Joe H under the current management. I respect Joe H's opinions, and am glad to hear that they are getting their act together. There were enough problems with my ONE meal A YEAR ago that I hadn't thought of going back. Maybe I'll try them out again.

If lack of adequate service and bait and switch sales tactics are "exactly like Italy" than bingo, this place is spot on. I dined there last year this time and there was exactly one waiter and two buspersons for the entire dining room (I am guessing 50 seats). They were out of both of my wine selections and the maitre d'/waiter/owner (?) kept pushing the special bottle of wine on me that they just got in. It was in my price range, even($60). What I was served was two bottles of pedestrian Chianti Classico. I was entertaining six friends so I just decided to relax and try to enjoy the evening as much as possible. My meal was alright (not good, merely alright), the service was ridiculously slow and unbelievably presumptuous (wife ordered Grey Goose cosmo to start, ergo all other drinks served to table were premium, regardless of how they were ordered). The food was middling at best and certainly not seasonal (mozzarella caprese in January?). I value Joe H.'s opinion and often look for his reviews before making dinner plans. We certainly had different experiences, and I think we might have eaten at different restaurants. Maybe they sold the place or have had a management change, but the restaurant that I ate at had so many obvious flaws I won't be going back any time soon.

Mr. Landrum, Many thanks for your kind reply and I have removed my tin foil cap. I am now clearly picking up what you are telepathically puttin' down. The Master Prestidigitador program sounds great, you are truly pushing the envelope. Any chance they will be dressed as Samurai? A few more questions: Will I have my choice of still, sparkling, or tap? What about parking? In the event I feel the service provided by the mittened Onan-Goan is subpar, I will require that he/she/it (?) be decapitated at my table and their still beating heart thrown onto an anti-griddle (fifteen seconds, each side). Will you have the strength to carry this out? Do you have an anti-griddle? Again, this is important to me. edit- I suffer from Latex Allergy Type I and can go into anaphylactic shock if I come near a latex balloon. Please, for the love of God, handle all of my food with bare hands and do not decorate with any type of latex balloons (Mylar is OK, and I love the ones that depict Chicken Little.

Mr. Landrum, This sounds like a wonderful opportunity. I am thinking of buying this for myself as a special holiday treat. Before I do, I have some questions. 1) Is there a kid's menu? 2) Are you going to be able to squeeze mini-burgers into the petri dish? If so, medium rare, puh-leaze! 3) Will there be any uses of foam? I love foam. 4) Is the wine pairing included, or will it be decontructed and integrated into the dish? 5) Will the waiters be trained in ballet? This is important to me. 6) How much for the happy ending? Thank you in advance for your consideration.

Mama Mia! Sono stato becato!

3 out of 5 stars? I think it was 2 out of 4. ...and start looking at the paper I am reading!

Come January 1, I am packing up the tribe and doing the hajj to Disney World (aka, Vegas for kids). I am petrified that once I leave the compound, it'll be Olive Garden's galore. Any suggestions?

Steep fresh grated ginger, mint and honey in boiling water about 10 Minutes. Stare at it, then drink a shot of Makers Mark. Some people mix the two. Not me.

I've never had an "on" night in Galileo. I have had a delightful meal in the Lab (albeit, IMHO not worth the money I paid-$180pp w/wine). I've had good eats with truculent service at the bar. And I've had two disappointing meals with abyssmal service and a hefty fee in the restaurant proper. There won't be a third. The grill is great, but I don't think I'll darken their doors except for the grill and a possible trip to the Lab.

I live in Fairfax, where is this place? And how did you find it?

Not at all. Ignoring them was my nasty intention. Realizing they actually didn't have a reservation and that I needed their table back: priceless.

No, but I have seen her nekkid picture! As an aside, the restaurant was actually full that night, so I didn't ask them to leave just because I felt like being nasty.

Saute Shiitakes, Sundried Tomatoes, Kalamata Olives, basil chiffonades and Pine nuts in Olive Oil with some garlic. Add a bit of chicken stock (or salt free broth) and a big handful of goat cheese ( I have medium sized man-hands for those of you cooks who actually measure ) Simmer until cheese has melted. Toss in some farfalle, radiatore, or some other ridged pasta. Takes 10 minutes. Eat.

When I was the maitre d' of a restaurant several years ago, an obnoxious couple walked right by the front desk (I was on the phone, and tried to make eye contact), meandered through the restaurant, and seated themselves at one of the better tables. I followed them discreetely during their journey, and then informed every member of the staff to completely ignore them. About 15 minutes later, the lady approached, the front desk, fuming. "No one has even said a word to us for the past 15 minutes". Me: I am so sorry madam.You don't look familiar to me. Allow me to follow you back to your table and I will fix the problem. When we got back to the table, I looked at them quizzically. Me: I am so embarrassed. I don't even remember seating you. What was the name of your reservation? Name was offered. Me: That name doesn't sound familiar to me, I'll be right back. I came back a few minutes later. Me: I am horribly embarrassed by this situation. It appears that I don't have your reservation noted and I know I did not seat you. How did you get to this table? Miscreants: We just walked in and sat down. There was no sign that said "Please Wait to be Seated" Seriously. That's what they said. Me: No. We do not have a sign. Most of our guests wait at the desk if no one happens to be available. I apologize for this, but we are completely booked and you are going to have to leave. And out they went, meekly.

Alrighty! You obviously dine frequently in DC. What are your favorite dining destinations, be it cheap eats, haute cuisine, and everywhere in between?

Obviously there have been wonderful advancements in winemaking techniques in the last 25 years. Which ones do you wish would just go away? What innovations are currently eating away at the soul of winemaking?

To eat at TG Friday's is to hump the devil.

Any off the top of your head in Northern Virginia?

Jake, I live a mile from there and had no idea about this place! If by "near" you mean within a mile, you're kind of SOL. Under no circumstances should you dine at Brion's Grille (pronounced Bry-uhns Grill-ee). You'd be better off eating any little morsels that might reside under your passenger seat.

Terry: Can you list the local retailers that carry the largest selection of your German and Austrian wines?

Ala Carte menu? No inflated prices? Tom Power, you are a rebel!

I've never had to wait more than 15 minutes for a table at any location, at anytime. They have the call ahead seating down to a science. It's rare I'll wait an hour for anyone's food. Their meats are always troublesome. You literally have to order items a degree or two over what you generally order. I have always been surprised by that, because it seems to me they go to great lengths to get everything right. If you order rare, you get raw. Medium rare-raw. Medium is a rare in every other establishment. I actually order mine medium well. And it's the same in every restaurant. Is it the pinnacle of dining? Actually, for some it is. To me, it's just a consistent, mid-range restaurant with good to very good food and generally excellent service. And their salads are excellent. Shtich, the ahi tuna salad is more like rare ahi tuna served with sticky rice and some greens. Not too salady.

Really? I think the Crab fritters are delicious, and the ribs have always been great. I've had plenty of things that were mediocre, but nothing ever bad, and coupled with the generally excellent service I give them high marks. The quibbles: Same soups, same days, all restaurants About four side dishes/entree accompanniments for all dishes, all locations. I think they must have a team of people in Sterling stirring a huge cast iron skillet of corn. Those shitty wine glasses. The otherwise charming and acquiescent service is compromised by the "Can I interest you in the Dumbass Cocktail of the day or try to sell you tonight's special/fresh catch they start with. The beer. It's terrible. I have five empty growlers at home that are waiting for some sweet elixer to fill their empty shells. But every time I enter Sweetwater the beer sucks. The worst was the Pumpkin ale. The bartender tried to sell it to me and I told him I thought it would blow. He assured me it was great "our best seller" and plied me with a free one. It came rimmed with nutmeg and cinnamon. I wiped off the rim, took one sip, and it was horrible. I'd rather drink a warm Tecate.

No way I'd go to a Ristorante. I like Gree-lay as well, gonna add that to my lexicon, right behind the nw Cole-bare Ray-pore on Comedy Central.

More talk of language than langoustines. Bah-humbug!