"Inside The House"

[Capital Icebox]

Danny makes some excellent points above about extreme examples where "firing" a customer is necessary, and I couldn't agree more.

But this, from the column, doesn't seem to be one of them: "Remember, it is meant to be special. If your bottle is cheap and unremarkable, your server will know. The manager will know. The restaurant will know. And you will know they know -- by the quality of service you receive. Because in the eyes of the house, guests who abuse the policy are trying to take advantage of staff, and deserve exactly what they get. (P.S. OpenTable will know, too. Blacklisting corkage abusers is common -- which means your chances of getting a reservation at that place again may disappear forever.)"

Before my minor gripe (well, leading into it), an example from my own experience: Last Christmas, a superior from work was in town. He loves Champagne. Having been recently educated on the subject by a fine column in the Washingtonian, I bought him a nice bottle of bubbly. Nothing ridiculously expensive, but not cheap, either. It didn't seem "unremarkable" to me, but I hadn't had a chance to drink the stuff yet. The day he got in, I gave him the champagne, which he appreciated, and said, "Hey, we should bring this to dinner tonight!" I thought, "Yes! To dinner! At a restaurant with a low corkage fee! Where I have made the reservation on OpenTable! And I have no time to check to see if it's on their list! And when we arrive, since you don't know much about corkage policies here and come from a BYOB state, you can even protest the low corkage fee! (Which he did, albeit in a polite way.) And it's my first time dining here!"

Now, if I didn't know better, I may have read this column and thought to myself, "Great Caesar's Ghost! Am I blacklisted from this place forever?" It was my first time there, so I didn't have any other dining experience for the staff to rely on, I brought in a champagne that was good, but probably not great, the occasion wasn't special, and I even went so far as to complain about the corkage (not me personally, but the guy in my party). I might think this incident is forever etched into my OpenTable profile and I'll never eat be able to book a table there again. Or, if I do go back, the service will be so bad I won't want to return. Is it really so? (I haven't been back to eat there so I have no idea, but I suspect the answer is no.)

It might have been helpful to note in this part of the column that repeat corkage abusers, a la Messr. Ensphinctered-Duck-Call, will be subject to their own ring of OpenTable hell, while the ignorant-until-now should feel free to call the restaurant to ask about their corkage policies, wine list, and if they could bring a certain bottle in for dinner. (And if they have commited corkage faux pas in the past, no worries, but you may want to start a new OpenTable profile in your grandmother's name. Or in my case, leave a gigantic tip and give "Forgive him, for he knows not what he does" looks to our waitress.)

That said, this was another great column by one of our own, and I think the comments section underneath the column shows how needed this feature is. Either that, or all the lead in the drinking water has turned our fair city into a den of underworked, entitled schmucks, I'm not sure which.

P.S. I think many restaurants with corkage policies could help us be better customers by putting up their corkage policies on their websites, along with their wine list, and some notes about corkage etiquitte would be helpful, too. There is a great deal of ignorance out there about corkage policies out there, which is why I enjoyed reading Nadya's column and the threads here and on egullet about popping your cork in a restaurant.

P.S.S. Trader Joe's Peanut Butter will give you bad breath for days, much like Cool Ranch Doritos. Buyer Beware. (Sorry, it's on my mind.)

[porcupine]

the comments section underneath the column shows how needed this feature is.

I believe it shows how clueless some people continue to be even after they've been gently educated in a humorous fashion.. But then, I'm a cynic. And I like this emoticon and am happy to use it.

[The Hersch]

That said, this was another great column by one of our own, and I think the comments section underneath the column shows how needed this feature is. Either that, or all the lead in the drinking water has turned our fair city into a den of underworked, entitled schmucks, I'm not sure which.

It was a great column. Unfortunately, all the entitled schmucks who wrote comments don't get it, and the non-entitled-schmucks who wrote comments don't appear to need it. I think one lesson is that it's impossible to get through to entitled schmucks (other than, perhaps, by humiliating them in public).

[Waitman]

Plus, being called masturbatory really rocked.

Probably a side effect of your day job.

[Mark Slater]

Good article, Nadya. I think most of the comments posted on DCist are out of line. In Europe no one would dream of bringing wine to a restaurant, outside of perhaps a vigneron in the village where his wine is made. In my long career, I have actually seen people bring $5.99 bottles of Macon Village into a restaurant with the price tag still on the bottle. Of course, I have also seen people bring stunning, rare and very old bottles of wine in, as well. My sommelier friends in California are even starting to limit the number of bottles they will allow to be brought into the restaurant. It's a tricky subject and an emotional one, too.

[Banco]

Good article, Nadya. I think most of the comments posted on DCist are out of line. In Europe no one would dream of bringing wine to a restaurant, outside of perhaps a vigneron in the village where his wine is made. In my long career, I have actually seen people bring $5.99 bottles of Macon Village into a restaurant with the price tag still on the bottle. Of course, I have also seen people bring stunning, rare and very old bottles of wine in, as well. My sommelier friends in California are even starting to limit the number of bottles they will allow to be brought into the restaurant. It's a tricky subject and an emotional one, too.

Your anecdotes reinforce my opinion that a purveyor's creative ideas for the pleasure of his customers can end up demeaning and diminishing both. The "customer is king" mentality of most American restaurateurs and patrons produces a codependent relationship fraught with tension. Where else but in America would one come up with the silly idea of bringing your own wine to a restaurant anyway? No wonder so many clear-thinking people can't abide the so-called "fancy" restaurant and leave it disappointed; there are too many contradictions between the notion of customer-as-king and the creative sovereignty and authority of the chef to whom these kings are ostensibly paying tribute through their attendance. It may be emotional, but it isn't tricky. Many people simply don't have a clue how to behave in a restaurant (I believe this used to be called savoir faire) and most Americans' attitudes toward food are just as full of contradictions and naivete as their attitudes toward other matters of the body, such as sex, nutrition, or physical fitness.

[DonRocks]

Where else but in America would one come up with the silly idea of bringing your own wine to a restaurant anyway?

Maybe some other country where restaurants regularly charge five times what a wine is worth? Countries where a restaurant will routinely charge $50 for a shitty bottle of table wine, and then attempt to make their customers feel guilty for trying to find ways around the problem?

[Banco]

Maybe some other country where restaurants regularly charge five times what a wine is worth? Countries where a restaurant will routinely charge $50 for a shitty bottle of table wine, and then attempt to make their customers feel guilty for trying to find ways around the problem?

Don, you and others on this board have pointed out a number of restaurants where the markups are quite reasonable but corkage is still offered. Therefore, there must be other reasons than the purely economic ones you mention for this policy. Those are the reasons I was trying to get at. I also point your attention to the earlier discussion of BYOB and its origins in Prohibition, or would you like to argue that Prohibition was an economically rational piece of decision-making as well?

I should also add that when I said corkage is "silly" I meant that from an abstract, Martian-looking-at-Earth perspective. Mark Slater's comments, I thought, invited such a perspective. In the context of American dining culture, however, I realize there are all kinds of reasons that corkage exists, and its those unique reasons I was trying to explore. I don't think all them reflect well on the restaurateur-customer relationship here, and they certainly are not all economic.

[cjsadler]

Maybe some other country where restaurants regularly charge five times what a wine is worth? Countries where a restaurant will routinely charge $50 for a shitty bottle of table wine, and then attempt to make their customers feel guilty for trying to find ways around the problem?

Amen, brother... which is why it's been nice to see places such as Corduroy, Dino, Ray's, Tallula, 2 Amy's and others turn the tide in DC recently, bringing wine prices down to levels that allow us all to enjoy a good bottle.

[Mark Slater]

Amen, brother... which is why it's been nice to see places such as Corduroy, Dino, Ray's, Tallula, 2 Amy's and others turn the tide recently, bringing wine prices down to levels that allow us all to enjoy a good bottle.

Go to Mexico and enjoy a bottle of Kendall Jackson Vintners Reserve chardonnay for $90US. Same deal in Canada. Their liquor store prices are higher than our restaurant prices. Go to ADNY in Manhattan and enjoy the same bottle of Dom Perignon that I sell for $250 for $600. Don't even think about drinking American wine in France.

[DLB]

From the comments section on DCIST Nadya really set off something with that last article:

I work for OpenTable and am writing to respond to a misperception regarding OpenTable and diner privacy.

OpenTable does not track diner behavior within a restaurant nor does it provide restaurants with access to any such information.

I believe the confusion stems from a misunderstanding of our technology and how restaurants use it. The best restaurants have always gone to great efforts to treat their customers well, by, for example, recognizing them from past visits and recalling their preferences (such as food allergies, favorite waiters or special requests). Traditionally, restaurants accomplished this feat of recall by jotting notes on index cards. The OpenTable system, among other operational functions, simply enables the restaurateur to store guest preferences in the restaurant’s computer instead of in a file box. Any notes a restaurant may record are not shared with other restaurants or with OpenTable.

Privacy is an important issue which we take very seriously. For more information, I encourage you to read our Privacy Policy.

Ann Shepherd

Sr. Director, Consumer Marketing

OpenTable, Inc.

Amen, brother... which is why it's been nice to see places such as Corduroy, Dino, Ray's, Tallula, 2 Amy's and others turn the tide in DC recently, bringing wine prices down to levels that allow us all to enjoy a good bottle.

I love ordering wines at these places. There should be wine for evey budget on a list

[Nadya]

From the comments section on DCIST Nadya really set off something with that last article:

I love ordering wines at these places. There should be wine for evey budget on a list

The OpenTable rep did not contradict what I wrote in any sense. I never said restaurants share information on their patron. Only that they are capable of keeping records of individual customers - within individual restaurants.

[DLB]

The OpenTable rep did not contradict what I wrote in any sense. I never said restaurants share information on their patron. Only that they are capable of keeping records of individual customers - within individual restaurants.

So a you can prevent a customer from makeing a reservation?

[Escoffier]

Don't even think about drinking American wine in France.

Why not? We had some very nice Oregon Pinot in Paris and it wasn't that expensive. LaVinia in Paris carries a large selection of American wines at reasonable prices (not as reasonable as French wines but what would you expect?).

[Stretch]

Any notes a restaurant may record are not shared with other restaurants or with OpenTable.

Dammit. I wish I'd known this before I shelled out $20 to get: "Hung like a baby carrot!" added to Al Dente's OpenTable profile.

[Al Dente]

Dammit. I wish I'd known this before I shelled out $20 to get: "Hung like a baby carrot!" added to Al Dente's OpenTable profile.

Did your wife or yo mama tell you that?

[Nadya]

So a you can prevent a customer from makeing a reservation?

I don't make these kinds of decisions. If my GM instructs me that a certain person is no longer welcome, I will enforce that policy, but our management, bless their hearts, tends to shield us from confronting the customer and thankfully picks up that unpleasant bit of business for themselves.

On a more realistic level, it seems that the heart of your question goes to:

"Can negative info in my OpenTable profile within an individual restaurant influence how I am treated in this restaurant in future?"

And the answer is: absolutely. If your history says, 19 reservations, including 12 cancellations and 3 no-shows, why should I reserve a nice table for you over a regular who I know will show up? If you threw a hissy fit on your prior visit, there will be a record and waiters will be alerted. If there is some other unseemly behavior on the record, OF COURSE it will be reflected in your experience. If you yell at the person who sells you stamps at the Post Office, you think they will serve you cookies when you happen to drop by next time?

I should note that people who act normally on their subsequent visits are likely to have their record cleared. How? Like so:

"Hey Joe, table 87 is a PPA (pain in ass.)"

"OK, thanks."

An hour later.

"Hey Joe, how's 87 treating you?"

"Oh, they're fine. Low maintenance. Tipped 20%."

"Great, let me go unclick that PPA box."

[Mark Slater]

"Great, let me go unclick that PPA box."

Darling,

The accepted abbreviation for that phrase is: PITA (pain in the *ss)

[dinwiddie]

Many (many, many) years ago while I was in college I worked in a fancy restaurant in Hollywood CA. Well before the days of computers, we had a card file on all our regular customers and any customer who had been a PITA. Any of us working there could add a card or have the hostess add something to an existing card.

I remember reading the card one of the waiters had written about one very young couple. It went something like "Nice kids, obviously nervous, appreciated being here, very polite and grateful, he left a decent tip even though it is obvious it was his next to last dollar, I think this was a special date for them." When they made a reservation again (exactly a year later) I was told to give them a great table and make sure they get treated special.

On the other hand, there were some regulars who had a tendency to drink too much and get a little "touchy feely" with the waitresses (this was in the early 70s). Even though they tipped well, we were told to make sure that they got tables in the back and if possible a waiter not a waitress. Several of them were regularly told that we didn't have a reservation available until they finally got the message that the management didn't really want their patronage.

We also had a list of people from whom we would not take a check (you could actually pay for dinner with one of those things in those days) and a very short list of folks who were not to be given a reservation under any circumstances (I never did find out what those three folks did to get them on that list.)

[DLB]

That sounds real old school. I don't think people care all that much anymore.

[Jacques Gastreaux]

That sounds real old school. I don't think people care all that much anymore.

I disagree. I think most restaurateurs care very much how their establishment is generally perceived by the public and have an interest in discouraging or keeping out those whose presence and behavior might detract from that perception. I can think of a certain group, one of whose members is a duck call afficianado, that is not welcome at a restaurant that is very popular with DR.com subscribers.

[Nadya]

Revolution Number Nine

[Banco]

Revolution Number Nine

Nice to have you back, Nadya.

[DLB]

Does it really take three plates to replace one dish? I am sure most restaurants have some kind of cushion to cover food waste.

[shogun]

Does it really take three plates to replace one dish? I am sure most restaurants have some kind of cushion to cover food waste.

If you're comping the replacement, you're not making up the cost of one dish, you're making up the cost of two. The cost of 'it takes three' (or however many) dishes works against your bottom line until the profit from the dishes make up for 1) Themselves and 2) The 'lost' dish's cost AND profit margin. Unless you raise prices on that dish for the rest of the night, you're not catching up any faster to make up the lost money.

Unless you are building in rediculous percentages. The replacement dish can make up for the lost one if you charge the customer double for the replacement instead of comping them. Sorry!

Are you as a customer really willing to subsidize what would amount to 'lost food insurance' by paying an extra couple of percent?

This is my potentially flawed understanding of the statement.

[Jacques Gastreaux]

Does it really take three plates to replace one dish? I am sure most restaurants have some kind of cushion to cover food waste.

Off the top of my head, I can't see how sales of other plates, no matter how many, can ever make up for the lost cost of the food that went into the trash, along with the lost profit from that dish. It's just plain lost and nothing the restaurantuer can do can change that harsh fact.

[shogun]

The people who comment on your articles, Nadya, obviously did not have parents who loved them, and for that I am saddened, both for you and them.

[Banco]

The people who comment on your articles, Nadya, obviously did not have parents who loved them, and for that I am saddened, both for you and them.

Geez, you're right! (A couple of nice ripostes, though, that had me yelling "bravo" at my monitor.)

[DCJono]

Does it really take three plates to replace one dish? I am sure most restaurants have some kind of cushion to cover food waste.

The other way of looking at this is how much future revenue are you losing from the customer and however many friends and family they tell about their bad experience? How much will it cost you to replace that guest?

[Nadya]

Dearest pumpkins, I appreciate your support as always. The comments are of course amusing, but then again, any reaction is a good sign.

They didn't really say too many nasty things. Could use some editing? No speaka English too good. Highbrow and masturbatory? I can't really claim alienation from either.

Seems like enough people enjoy it, and for that I am grateful.

P.S. I floated the idea of running The Best of From The Trenches Thread as Restaurant Week approaches...let's see what the reaction will be to THAT.

[Al Dente]

Amen sister.

Recently overheard customer complaint:

"But I didn't know your pancetta had PORK in it..."

Asshat...

[Banco]

Dearest pumpkins, I appreciate your support as always. The comments are of course amusing, but then again, any reaction is a good sign.

They didn't really say too many nasty things. Could use some editing? No speaka English too good. Highbrow and masturbatory? I can't really claim alienation from either.

Seems like enough people enjoy it, and for that I am grateful.

P.S. I floated the idea of running The Best of From The Trenches Thread as Restaurant Week approaches...let's see what the reaction will be to THAT.

Nadya, may your brows continue to be high and your masters Tory.

[qwertyy]

I find the complaining folks as sigh-inducing as "family" groups that complain about TV programs. People: You are welcome to not partake. Some of us like it.

And I'm always amused by the critics who complain about others' writing while using the hyphen (?!?!) as their go-to punctuation.

Nice piece, Nadya.

[Hannah]

I find the complaining folks as sigh-inducing as "family" groups that complain about TV programs. People: You are welcome to not partake. Some of us like it.

Gah. The last time we flew through La Guardia we were stuck sitting next to a couple of Parents Television Council mommies. Apparently the shows on the Disney Channel (!) are bad because the children told someone to "shut up."

On the other hand, the Tuscan bean soup at the Todd English place (Figs I think) was sufficiently good that I didn't throw it at them.

[Nadya]

Oldies, but goodies.

[erikv]

Oldies, but goodies.

Outstanding column today! Those stories make me appreciate everyone in the restaurant industry even moreso! Thanks!

[Mark Slater]

Outstanding column today! Those stories make me appreciate everyone in the restaurant industry even moreso! Thanks!

The best part is she's not making this stuff up.

[DLB]

Oldies, but goodies.

I don't understand why restaurants participate in Restaurant Week, if they don't want to deal with these type issues. It almost seems as if you are waiting for restaurant week just to make fun of those that don't dine out on a regular basis, and don't know the "rules". I have stopped going out for restaurant week, because the service always seems to be somewhat condescending in nature....... just like most of these articles.

[Jacques Gastreaux]

It looks like the fan mail is running overwhelmingly in Nadya's favor. Only one neegative commenter so far, and he/she is probably the very type at whom the article is aimed; and the very type unlikely to realize it.

[Nadya]

I don't understand why restaurants participate in Restaurant Week, if they don't want to deal with these type issues. It almost seems as if you are waiting for restaurant week just to make fun of those that don't dine out on a regular basis, and don't know the "rules". I have stopped going out for restaurant week, because the service always seems to be somewhat condescending in nature....... just like most of these articles.

I think we all are entitled to the privilege of making fun of that which is funny. Don't you think it's funny when someone expects to be able to book two prime slots on a Saturday night and choose one later?

You think my car mechanic doesn't make fun of me looking at him pleadingly and trying to describe the noises my car makes? Like, the second I walk out?

[bilrus]

because the service always seems to be somewhat condescending in nature....... just like most of these articles.

Sometimes people, based on either their own rudeness or obliviousness, should be condescended to.

[DonRocks]

I think we all are entitled to the privilege of making fun of that which is funny. You think my car mechanic doesn't make fun of me looking at him pleadingly and trying to describe the noises my car makes? Like, the second I walk out?

Nadya, serious question: why don't they get a second person to work the stand during crush time? If the answer is "money," I'd direct my ire at management more than I would someone calling at 7 PM for a 7:30 reservation.

Cheers,

Rocks.

[Heather]

Sometimes people, based on either their own rudeness or obliviousness, should be condescended to.

Did Customer Service for 9 years at the Kennedy Center (and believe me, some of the poeple I dealt with were like the RW folks) and sorry, I don't agree. Polite but firm, sure. But nothing to their faces.

[Jacques Gastreaux]

Did Customer Service for 9 years at the Kennedy Center (and believe me, some of the poeple I dealt with were like the RW folks) and sorry, I don't agree. Polite but firm, sure. But nothing to their faces.

He said "sometimes," not "always."

[Nadya]

Nadya, serious question: why don't they get a second person to work the stand during crush time? If the answer is "money," I'd direct my ire at management more than I would someone calling at 7 PM for a 7:30 reservation.

Cheers,

Rocks.

We actually do ALWAYS have two people working the stand at all times. One, known as "point", to assign tables, and the other, known as "runner", to take people to tables and monitor dining room.

During restaurant week we would sometimes get a third person to sit in the office and take phone calls during lunch/dinner rushes. This is a huge help, and most helpful when taking reservations for days following today. I am very grateful to our management for taking this step. You have simply no idea what the phone traffic is like between 6 and 9 pm on a regular RW night. It's really bad.

It's a bit less helpful to manage ongoing traffic, since I am the one with the list of bookings for today, and the person taking the calls has to check with me before taking anyone for tonight. Typically, this is what would happen:

Intercom to host stand, "Can you take four at eight?"

"No."

"Ok."

The point isn't that you CAN'T call between these hours. THe point is that if you do, your experience will be worse. You'll be on hold a lot, and I'll be harried. Because there's too much going on.

[bilrus]

Did Customer Service for 9 years at the Kennedy Center (and believe me, some of the poeple I dealt with were like the RW folks) and sorry, I don't agree. Polite but firm, sure. But nothing to their faces.

No - not to their faces, but behind their backs is another story.

[Heather]

He said "sometimes," not "always."

I didn't agree with "sometimes".

And good for Bis for getting an extra person to help with the phones during RW. Answering the phone has got to be so annoying when you have several people standing in front of you.

[Jacques Gastreaux]

I didn't agree with "sometimes".

And good for Bis for getting an extra person to help with the phones during RW. Answering the phone has got to be so annoying when you have several people standing in front of you.

On the first point, some will just have to agree to disagree, there may be the occaisonal rube that comes along who is just so clueless that you just can't help yourself.

On the second point, it seems like a waste of resources. To have to hire someone to answer the phone during dinner hours at a busy restaurant just so the caller can be told that nothing is available is a drag. It is an expenditure on the clueless and does not encourage them to get a clue.

[Nadya]

On the second point, it seems like a waste of resources. To have to hire someone to answer the phone during dinner hours at a busy restaurant just so the caller can be told that nothing is available is a drag. It is an expenditure on the clueless and does not encourage them to get a clue.

During RW it's a big help to get someone to answer the phone during dinner/lunch rushes to take reservations for the following days. Because I'm too busy managing guests in front of me to look up the bookings for tomorrow, day after, etc. The point I was making that whoever's answering the phones can successfully manage requests for the following days, but not for "right now". Managing requests for "right now" requires buzzing me, distracting me, and most often nothing is available anyway because even if something was, there's fifteen walk-ins at the bar waiting their turn, and the person at the office can't see that.

[DanCole42]

On the first point, some will just have to agree to disagree, there may be the occaisonal rube that comes along who is just so clueless that you just can't help yourself.

On the second point, it seems like a waste of resources. To have to hire someone to answer the phone during dinner hours at a busy restaurant just so the caller can be told that nothing is available is a drag. It is an expenditure on the clueless and does not encourage them to get a clue.

They're not there to educate the clueless, they're there to take care of them and make sure they don't stab themselves in the eyes with their own forks (benefit to the gene pool that would be).

I've always taken the "more flies with honey" approach to customer service. For some people this works, for others it doesn't. If you've ever been on the receiving end of a condescending service provider, you know how irate it makes you and why it's such a better idea to offer the polite smile.

I think having the extra people around to take phone calls, even if they're just "no"s is a fantastic help. It means that people like Nadya are spending more time attending to the people IN the restaurant. Customers who are physically there at your place of business are measures of magnitude more important than customers on the phone (something the manager at Kinko's failed to grasp during my two hour sojurn there the other day - urge to strangle... rising!). This is a zone defense to make sure Nadya can perform the more important part of her job.