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Spiral Stairs

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  1. Spiral Stairs
    Then there's this Calvin Trillin thing. As a city boy confounded and frightened by suburban ways, I must ask: Are these places actually walkable without having to play Frogger across ten lanes of speeding traffic? (Or is a game of Frogger assumed?)
  2. Spiral Stairs
    Locanda may be a step above typical Hill fare. The proprietor is a former manager of Le Paradou. He piped up in a Kliman and/or Sietsema chat, in which he said he aspires to join the ranks of Belga/Sonoma/Montmartre as the "good" restaurants in SE Capitol Hill. (He was proud to say that his restaurant would be located in the "triangle" created by those restaurants.)He also said the menu will be Italian, with Turkish influences. Let's hope he's found a chef who can pull that off in a way that's not totally contrived.
  3. Spiral Stairs
    I don't know what kind of desk Sietsema sits at, but at my desk the decor is truly awful. And the service is even worse.I feel fortunate that I made a reservation for our anniversary dinner before this review came out. However, I will probably obsessively and compulsively call to confirm it until the day arrives. (Three weeks to go. Gentlemen, start your phones.)
  4. Spiral Stairs
    It reads like ** and 3/4. Or 4/5. That third star is a bitch, apparently.
  5. Spiral Stairs
    My wife and I will be celebrating our anniversary at RTC specifically because of the fried chicken. (More accurately, specifically because of the rave reviews of the fried chicken; we haven't been to RTC yet.) She drools at the thought of any fried chicken. These reviews make her jaw literally unhinge and detach from her head.
  6. Spiral Stairs
    I am still traumatized from my trip to Fusion Grill. We sat outside, and experienced what was quite possibly the worst service I have ever encountered. Nothing went right. We waited too long for menus (which then sat on our table, after ordering, until I asked they be taken away); too long for drinks (which had been forgotten); and an unbelievably long time for our entrees (this turned into an epic, two-hour-plus experience). Our table was broken, such that a carelessly placed elbow would cause the whole tabletop to act as a catapult. Three or four other outdoor tables were occupied, and I saw the same things going on at those tables: missing silverware; incorrect entree delivery; and assorted other mishaps. Foodwise, I take some blame for what I was subjected to. Against all better judgment, I ordered a ribeye steak, medium rare. What I got was a purported steak, very well done. Not being an expert, I suppose it may have been a ribeye, but it was thinner and, well, worse, than any other ribeye I've had. My wife got a fried beef thing that was actually pretty good. I guess if you're going to go, stick with the Chinese stuff, and you may do okay. (One thing I noticed from my wife's food and from looking at other plates: They make their Chinese dishes look "fusion-y" by forming the white rice into a cube on the plate to the side of the meat, instead of in a pile or a bowl. How swank!) I mentioned to our waiter that my steak was overcooked, who assured me he had told the kitchen to prepare it medium rare. He said he would check on it but he never mentioned it again. Oh, and despite the obvious delays we encountered and problems with the food, nothing was offered or done to make us happy. Suffice it to say we won't be going back. (Note: Apparently, the old Szechuan House menu is the take-out menu. The Fusion Grill menu is only for sit-down.)
  7. Spiral Stairs
    Looks like I'll be able to come, with one wife and one baby in tow. You'll know me from the screaming infant in one arm and spit-up stains on the other. As for food, I'll be bringing a few bottles and a selection of milks. And some adult food too, though I cannot say what until I accurately measure the degree to which I am willing to subject my paltry cooking skills to the critique of experts. I am working on this determination now.
  8. Spiral Stairs
    I don't know if it is still in place, but Evanston, Illinois used to have an unusual law governing fast food establishments. 24-hour "fast food" restaurants were prohibited; "fast food" was defined as food that was, on the customer's request, provided in a paper bag. (At least this was the common understanding of the law; I'm sure the statute/regulation was actually more complex than this.) It didn't stop a 24-hour Burger King from operating. If you wanted an order to go at Burger King, they would give you your food on a tray and then hand you a bag. I'm sure that caused a great deal of confusion among out-of-towners who didn't know the odd backstory.
  9. Spiral Stairs
    Well, my wife ate a steak. The little one ate from my wife. Ergo, by the transitive property...
  10. Spiral Stairs
    I've finally gotten my wife to order medium well. This is progress. I don't expect to be able to move her any further. I can't resist showing everyone how we got our baby off to a good start in the world of dining.
  11. Spiral Stairs
    I wish I could drag my shy ass, and the shy ass of my wife, to this. But we're tied to a 7-week-old right now, who isn't really up for it. I hope for another opportunity in a couple months, when the boy can focus on faces more than three feet away and track moving objects (like venison pepperoni being conveyed into my mouth).
  12. Spiral Stairs
    After his second dinner at RTS, on Sunday, my dad said he wants to make it a tradition on every visit he makes to DC. I said, "Fine. Be that way." My wife, dad, and 6-week-old miniature person showed up just after five and were seated at the corner banquette by the table. The logistics were really perfect: With three adults, the miniature person got to stay in his carseat in the secure corner, tended to by his mother at first, then by me when she realized she needed two hands to eat her steak. I figured that because we were going early and because the Sunday hours are new, it would be relaxed and less crowded. True dat. It was leisurely and relaxed, never more than half-full. I'm sure Sundays will get more crowded as word gets out. Food-wise, ditto to every post above. Except the bad ones.
  13. Spiral Stairs
    Wow. It's like you made the change to RTS's hours specifically to accommodate the circumstances of my life. My dad had such a great experience at RTS during his last visit to DC that on the car ride from the airport today he asked if we wanted to go tomorrow. (He hasn't asked to repeat any other restaurant or activity.) I said, "Oh, but on Saturday it will be really crowded." And I thought to myself, "Curses! If only RTS were open on Sunday! Why must life prove to be an endless series of disappointments and traumas?" Problem solved. One thing has changed since our last visit: We have a 6-week old baby. Will there be a problem parking him in his infant carrier on a booth? (We're beginners at the whole project of dining out with him -- don't know exactly where it is safe and convenient to put a carrier. Will the infant carrier teeter precariously on a chair? (I suppose this is a general question that isn't totally RTS-specific.))
  14. Spiral Stairs
    My crystal ball says Tom gives Blue Duck Tavern 2.5 stars this weekend. (Because he said in his chat he was reviewing it this week, and he said on WTOP that whatever he reviewed this week received 2.5 stars.)
  15. Spiral Stairs
    I hate having to sit this RW out, but the only place my two-week old son will agree to eat is at the teat. It's a buffet.
  16. Spiral Stairs
    I have no comment on the food, but I note that the name violates several well-established rules of restaurant nomenclature: Rule 101.1(a): "No restaurant shall be named with the possessive form of an inanimate object." Rule 104.3(a): "No restaurant shall adopt a name that incorporates gratuitous and meaningless references to 'peppers', 'spices', or 'hot[ness]'. (See also Rule 105.2, prohibiting usage of 'Senor' or 'Captain' in restaurant names.)" Rule 105.6(a): "Unless one of the restaurant's proprietors is actually named 'Jack,' the name 'Jack' shall not appear in the name of the restaurant." And, of course, the cardinal rule: Rule 100(a): "All restaurant names that sound as though they may have been used in Office Space are strictly prohibited."
  17. Spiral Stairs
    Will Don have the stomach to ... break off that post into a separate Applebee's thread? I will be checking all day.
  18. Spiral Stairs
    I always thought it would be cool to put a restaurant in the former Miles Glass building, just off the SE/SW Freeway, on 8th St. SE. (See here.) Maybe a retro, Majestic Cafe-type place. Or just a really good diner. It's situated plumb in the middle of the resurgence of Southeast, south of the freeway. Close enough to the new stadium site to bask in its glow, too. However, it recently became a tire store. The market has spoken, the invisible hand moved! Let them eat rubber.
  19. Spiral Stairs
    Thus spake Sietsema: Zero stars.
  20. Spiral Stairs
    When we're getting a doggie bag from a restaurant, I move the bread from the breadbasket onto our plates when the server's not looking. (I'm too embarrassed to be noticed doing it.)
  21. Spiral Stairs
    (Aside: This thread firmly establishes the link between food and sex.) Having lost my Ray's virginity last night, I'll just add another exclamation point to everything already said. I come from a casual family. (Last night, my visiting father asked if he should change into long pants for Ray's. My honest response was that I really didn't know, so he changed.) I am a casual guy. I hate jackets. I hate ties. According to my wife, I hate pants. And, accordingly, my list of favorite restaurants is populated by places that refuse to endorse the notion that high-quality food requires formality and pretension. Add Ray's to that short list. I think my dad could have gotten away with shorts.
  22. Spiral Stairs
    Tonight, I lose my Ray's virginity. Since we're talking about comparison, I hope tonight's experience is not a fumbling and unexpectedly fast exercise in deflated expectations.
  23. Spiral Stairs
    I really wanted to like Jimmy T's, because I want to like all neighborhoody greasy spoons. But I wasn't very impressed in my one visit. My potatoes had an off-taste I couldn't put my finger on; portions were small; service was theoretical. I'd rather hit Tunnicliff's.
  24. Spiral Stairs
    I've been to Mamma Lucia once. (In Bethesda -- don't know if there's more than one.) I was in a big group that included children not sprung off by me. It seemed like a perfect place for kids. The staff and clientele were tolerant and friendly. And, I might add, my entree was delicious. It was a pasta with a spicy pork sauce -- can't recall the name. But when it was served, the following things occurred: (1) I thought, "Wow, that's big, I'll never finish it"; then (2) I thought, "Wow, that was big, I can't believe I finished it."
  25. Spiral Stairs
    I celebrated my 21st birthday hiding from members of my fraternity who wanted to dump me into Lake Michigan. Ahh, the good old days. Personally, I think there is an inverse relationship between size of plates and festive, celebratory atmosphere. Small plates = Big festiveness. Any Jose Andres place would work well, based on that formula.
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