Etiquette, The Two-Way Street

[Jacques Gastreaux]

I am not sure I would have went as far as not accepting the tip.

Some people's money is just no good.

[DLB]

Some people's money is just no good.

I don't agree in this case.

I know some people who will only tip $1 for lunch and $2 for dinner. I also know some people who will start decreasing the tip as soon as they step place in the joint. "The host gave me a dirty look, thats $2 off the tip." "The busperson did not bring my water fast enough, that's another dollar" I am not joking about this , I no longer go out with these people.

[Jacques Gastreaux]

I don't agree in this case.

I know some people who will only tip $1 for lunch and $2 for dinner. I also know some people who will start decreasing the tip as soon as they step place in the joint. "The host gave me a dirty look, thats $2 off the tip." "The busperson did not bring my water fast enough, that's another dollar" I am not joking about this , I no longer go out with these people.

This has nothing to do with the amount of the tip. Brian was treated so poorly that he didn't want their money. I'm not sure I woud have reacted the same way Brian did, but I can certainly see where he was coming from that evening.

[DonRocks]

[Jacques, DLB, please take this to PM. Thanks, Rocks.]

[crackers]

Sometimes one simply cannot put a monetary amount on the satisfaction of being able to tell someone who has mistreated you to take a flying leap. Obviously Brian decided he would be best satisfied to not accept any gratuity. To him it was worth it. Sounds like a story from waiterrant.net!

[DLB]

I had the worse service tonight at a popular pizza place near the cathedral tonight. The waitress had a really bad demeanor from the beginning. The water glassed were not refilled, and the check was dropped off with dessert ( I hate this more than anything!). She did not speak when she picked up the check or when she brought my credit card back. I did not complain, but I left her a less than 15% tip. I also left her a note explaining why she had received way less than 15%. I was surprised by this, as I always receive very good service at this place. Was I out of line for leaving a note?

[Poivrot Farci]

Oh, and here are the keys to the cash register-help yourself!

You clearly have no concept of customer service

Neither do you.

The establishment is question is a small restaurant, not a spoiled frequent flyer’s airport lounge.

The virtues or vitriols of patience?

I do not eat out often. I do not know what an Ipod does. Not long ago I figured out that Turin and Torino are the same cities and that it is no coincidence that addresses on “letter”streets correspond with the intersecting “number” streets. I am a socially leprous and emotionally vacant imbecile who spends his time drinking 99 Bananas banana flavored schnapps in the primate house trying to seduce macaques in heat. I do however, have enough scruples and spasms of lucidity to differentiate a business from a charity.

The only difference between humans and wild creatures (australopithecus and gigantopithecus not withstanding) is that we have the patience and rationalization to justify standing and/or waiting in line. Some may argue that we wipe our asses too, but I have seen dogs prove otherwise on carpets. There is no economic model that I know of that commiserates waiting aside from diaper-wearing Johnny Q. 6-pack who keeps his hand on a Daihatsu pick-up for 76 hours. Perhaps in one of Roald Dahl’s fantasy worlds where Jackalopes roam free on Segways and it rains reefer do-nuts and no one is bald and check-out aisles magically pop up like toadstools so that no customer every has to wait behind someone paying with a check, and if they do have to wait they get hugs and cupcakes and free liquor and tickets to a Zappa show. In my reality, first come-first served is the status quo, as in waiting to enter metro trains, waiting to eat, or hanging out at the DMV. I wait in line in the order in which I arrived as a result of tolerance and respect bestowed in me and most of the inhabitants of the planet since birth and Copernicus, save for looters or desperate refugees.

Whereas restitution for a gaffe on the restaurant’s behalf is fair, in no way should a business give away anything if their fault is being busy on a Saturday night and unable to grant the lofty wishes of being seated in premium patio real-estate. Restaurants offer services in exchange for monies. The monies pay staff salaries, supplies, booze, linens and 1-to-3 ply toilet paper; depending on the cash flow and comp’ed drinks. The mission of restaurants does not encompass pity or benevolence. That’s what the Peace Corps and complimentary olives are for.

Customer service is who I call when my computer doesn’t function properly because, uh, someone has apparently been looking at lots and lots of pornography. Charitable organizations that offer free coffee for the penitent can be found on The District Line of the Washington City Paper.

St. Francis of Assisi may exemplify the Franciscan ethos of charity, poverty, and dogs/wolves, but Chef Frank of DC and other restaurant owners need to pay rent. Surely contributors in this forum know that net profits on the dollar from small restaurants are rather lean.

[mhberk]

no way should a business give away anything if their fault is being busy on a Saturday night and unable to grant the lofty wishes of being seated in premium patio real-estate.

If you re-read my post, you'll see that their "fault" had less to do with them being busy and more to do with their incompetence.

[Michael Landrum]

and the check was dropped off with dessert ( I hate this more than anything!).

It is entirely proper in a restaurant without tableclothes to deliver the check with dessert or shortly thereafter.

The fallacy that prompt check-delivery in a cafe is rude is an example of what is known in sociology and linguistics as hypercorrectness--applying rules from a higher status context inapproptiately or erroneously, such as saying, "The waiter brought stale bread to John and I."

The fact is, the number one complaint of American diners in study after study is the time it takes to receive and pay the check--across the board, but more so in tablecloth, fine-dining restaurants. In fact, the higher the level of the restaurant the greater the complaint. To many people, not having the check delivered right away is rude.

So an argument could be made that in proper American service (if we are to define "proper" as what is responsive to the needs and wants of those being served), even in fine dining establishments, the check should be delivered either with the dessert or shortly thereafter so as to not deprive (the argument against split infinitives is another example of hypercorrectness--Latin forbids it on a morphemic level, but English is a Germanic language; with the influx of low status German immigrants (in this country; in England the impetus was disavowal of kin and kind with the hated but oft-appeased UberAlles-ers), panicked Academics furiously sought to redefine English as a Romance language through the pedantic enforcement of ignorance-fostering, class-enforcing rules) the guest the opportunity to pay the check when he chooses.

[blakegwinn]

It is entirely proper in a restaurant without tableclothes to deliver the check with dessert or shortly thereafter.

I think a lot of diners mistakenly take a check drop as a sign to leave. I do admit that sometimes it IS a message but more often than not I just want to make sure you have the check there and ready when you want it. I don't see what is wrong with paying and continuing to enjoy your dessert/coffee. It really is a help to the server because we don't have to constantly check to see if you are ready. That being said I have never really dropped before or during dessert unless I heard mention of trying to make a show or something.

I think that Michael's studies are correct in that people HATE waiting around for a server to take payment and Murphy's law would dictate that after the check presenter sat untouched by you on your table for 25 minutes the exact second I tried to sneak out back to empty the linen bag would inevitably be the same moment you decided to pay. After looking around frustrated for a few minutes you would eventually grab one of my colleagues who is in the weeds and ask them to take care of it. Better to just throw a credit card down when I drop the check. This way whenever you decide you want to leave you will be ready to walk out the door instead of trying to flag me down.

Two other quick notes... I don't know how it works in other restaurants but at mine we can check out and go home as soon as all of our checks are paid. We don't have to wait for all of our tables to leave. If you see the restaurant clearing out but you still want to linger for another 45 minutes please just pay your check. Then you can hang out for as long as you want, I guarantee the closing server can refill your coffee for you. Just let me go home. There is nothing worse than doing a crossword for an hour, sidework done, waiting for one two top as they sip their coffee with my check presenter in their lap.

The second note, please for the love of God put your credit card in that top slip or at least somewhere visible. Same goes for cash, just make sure it is visible. It is a real tight rope act for a server because I am thinking, "Do I grab the book and see if there is something in it?" I run the risk making the diner feel rushed if they weren't ready to pay. Upsetting a diner right before tip time is never a good idea. The alternative is let it sit, but then you might possibly be making a diner who is rearing to get out of the restaurant sit there for 10 minutes. Again, not a good idea right before tip time.

[DLB]

It is entirely proper in a restaurant without tableclothes to deliver the check with dessert or shortly thereafter.

I disagree, I think the bill should be presented when the meal has been completed. I can understand doing this during lunch service when people are more in a rush to get back to work, but not during a nice early Sunday dinner. The restaurant was not packed as it usually is, and I don't even think there was wait at that hour. I also hate when a server already has the check prepared to drop on my table, while asking me if I would like to order dessert. If the response is no, the check is immediately placed on the table.

[Heather]

I am not getting the problem with dropping off the check with dessert, especially at a place like 2 Amy's which isn't fine dining, and where there are longs waits for tables.

It doesn't mean you have to leave right away. For us, having to wait for the check when we're ready to leave is far more annoying than geting it "too early". Then again, we usually have antsy kids and don't have the luxury of sipping our coffee for 30 minutes.

(And I probably wouldn't stiff a waitress for not filling my water. In most places that's the busboy's job.)

[Michael Landrum]

Another quick thought on the subject:

I find it interesting that it is in the ONLY business where payment is NOT required before or immediately upon rendering of services/delivery of goods that the consumer has seized so intractably on his right to not be bothered to pay except for exactly how and when he wants to, and then seized so righteously on his right to indignation and complaint regarding how the provider of services handles how the consumer handles HIS (the consumer's) obligation to pay for those goods and services.

Unsurprisingly, it is often the guest with the greatest demands and complaints regarding promptness in service and the divining of needs who takes the greatest offense in this matter. (Not you of course, DLB, you have always been a wonderfully charming and gracious guest)

[crackers]

I am not getting the problem with dropping off the check with dessert, especially at a place like 2 Amy's which isn't fine dining, and where there are longs waits for tables.

It doesn't mean you have to leave right away. For us, having to wait for the check when we're ready to leave is far more annoying than geting it "too early". Then again, we usually have antsy kids and don't have the luxury of sipping our coffee for 30 minutes.

I'm not getting the big problem either. It is an efficient way to do things. Especially if the drop off is accompanied by something like "... whenever you're ready." And likely at a place like 2Amys the waitstaff have been on their feet for many harried hours already by early Sunday dinner time, and efficiencies = sanity.

[deangold]

What does "when the meal is completed" mean?

After you have pulled out your laptop, checked your e-mail and shown your dinner companions you pcitures of your latest trip to Greece?

[DLB]

I'm not getting the big problem either. It is an efficient way to do things. Especially if the drop off is accompanied by something like "... whenever you're ready." And likely at a place like 2Amys the waitstaff have been on their feet for many harried hours already by early Sunday dinner time, and efficiencies = sanity.

The check was not my main issue, it was really the lack of service throughout the entire meal. The waitress did not say hello when she arrived at the table, water glasses were never re-filled while she hung out talking with the cooks, she never came by to see if everything was ok after the food came out. As I said, I have always had good service there, so I was a little shocked yesterday. I only expect the basics, and this is not what was received on yesterday.

[Josh Radigan]

Funny thing about what Mr Landrum posted about payment. It is actually in the defense ofa guest that if you come into a restaurant, order and consumme, and thus walk out, you are not liable. Its more of an ethics issue. It happened quite some time ago while iving in Richmond that this situation happened to a colleague of mine whereas a guy came ino his bar, sat down and had 2 drinks. He got up, went to the bathroom, then walked out. My friend went outside and cornered him demanding payment. The cops showed up, and explained to my friend that since he served him and didn't ask for payment immediately, he actually had no case against him. Some weird 'blue law' issue. Not that this was the case, but interesting I assume.

[blakegwinn]

I also hate when a server already has the check prepared to drop on my table, while asking me if I would like to order dessert. If the response is no, the check is immediately placed on the table.

You know you might find this interesting but always having the check ready is a requirement in at least 2 restaurants I have worked in. By requirement I mean if a secret shopper comes in and declines dessert and you don't have the check you get docked points on your write up. I almost always have all my checks on hand and just reprint them if I need to add coffee\dessert\etc. You would be surprised how many people think it is so cool when they say "No thanks just the check" to dessert and I pull it out of my waiter's pouch. I think the key is not holding it while discussing dessert. It seems from your account that the wait er/ress was holding it as they asked you. I probably wouldn't do that, I can see it coming off as pushy.

[Waitman]

I'm not getting the big problem either. It is an efficient way to do things. Especially if the drop off is accompanied by something like "... whenever you're ready." And likely at a place like 2Amys the waitstaff have been on their feet for many harried hours already by early Sunday dinner time, and efficiencies = sanity.

I like Michael's differentiation between "tablecloth" and -Non-tablecloth restaurants. In our family, that was the division between restaurants where you could eat your french fries with your fingers, or when you had to use the fork.

It's hard not to see a dropped check as and invitation to go away and, incidentally, an announcement that the server will no longer acknowledge your existence -- except to accept payment -- even if you are actually on fire. It's not a problem at a casual place, but at a swank joint where you've just dropped a couple of hundred bucks, it's a jarring and abrupt way to end the meal.

[Heather]

It's not a problem at a casual place, but at a swank joint where you've just dropped a couple of hundred bucks, it's a jarring and abrupt way to end the meal.

Of course. I can imagine that the service requirement Blake talked about in his post above is the other way 'round in a white tablecloth restaurant.

[Jacques Gastreaux]

I like Michael's differentiation between "tablecloth" and -Non-tablecloth restaurants. In our family, that was the division between restaurants where you could eat your french fries with your fingers, or when you had to use the fork.

It's hard not to see a dropped check as and invitation to go away and, incidentally, an announcement that the server will no longer acknowledge your existence -- except to accept payment -- even if you are actually on fire. It's not a problem at a casual place, but at a swank joint where you've just dropped a couple of hundred bucks, it's a jarring and abrupt way to end the meal.

But we are talking about an unnamed, popular pizza place located near the Cathedral. I would say that the more common experience in the white tableclothed environment is that the check comes too late, not too soon.

And does any of this have to do with "etiquette?' Or is this a "criticizing restaurants" issue?

[blakegwinn]

He got up, went to the bathroom, then walked out.

My brother (who is a manager at a national casual dining chain that is to remain nameless for his protection) had a diner who went into a show stopping head turning rant about not getting another steak after finishing about 9/10 of his current steak and then deciding the it was undercooked. This being a big national corporation when the GM was called over the guy was thrown like $50 in giftcards. Later on after the guy and his family of 5 had finished they threw a bunch of mangled cash in the book and made a quick exit. When the waiter finally picked up the book the family was long gone into the Chinatown night. As he finished counting he realized the guy was short 25-30 bucks.

I just happenned to call my brother about 10 minutes later to see what he was up to. He told me the story said they were getting ready to call corporate to try and get the gift cards voided. I had a better idea, take the numbers (which are all recorded in the sales log and work just like a credit card) and manually ring up the meal by punching in the numbers into the Posi. Plus figure in a 20 percent tip for the waiter. This left the balance at like 2 dollars. I smile to myself when I picture the guy's surprise when he tried to cash in on another free meal and had his card returned with a 2 dollar balance and upon inquiry finding out he was charged for the food he walked out on.

[Michael Landrum]

And does any of this have to do with "etiquette?' Or is this a "criticizing restaurants" issue?

My original point, actually, is that much criticism of restaurants is based upon poorly understood "rules" of etiquette, and that the abrogation of those "rules" is used to justify outrage at sensible service and business practises.

When you look at the function of etiquette in society--to marginalize and stigmatize lower status groups who otherwise threaten to usurp existing (and without such "rules" often ridiculously inept and worthless) power structures--it is no surprise that etiquette is often the rationalization for uncivil behavior and attitudes in restaurants.

Again, it is often when the "rule" of etiquette does not apply or is misapplied--when hypercorrection is in play--that the fallacious standard is most vociferously insisted upon.

[DLB]

I think this is about etiquette. I think I like the way the French do it:)

[Waitman]

I think this is about etiquette. I think I like the way the French do it:)

The French? Where your waiter just went out to have a smoke and rotate the on his 2CV and will have the check for you when he's done?

[Michael Landrum]

I think this is about etiquette. I think I like the way the French do it:)

In France, at a cafe, your check is brought with your dessert and coffee. You are expected to pay your bill, if not immediately, then promptly. And properly so.

Here in the provinces, a dauphin, when not a tator tot, is a one-eyed king and, blind to the difference, demands "apres moi" standards from cafes. (Twain, Borges, HG Wells, The Sun King and the recent Palena thread all in one sentence of sixteen words--beat that Farci!).

[erikv]

Here in the provinces, a dauphin, when not a tator tot, is a one-eyed king and, blind to the difference, demands "apres moi" standards from cafes. (Twain, Borges, HG Wells, The Sun King and the recent Palena thread all in one sentence of sixteen words--beat that Farci!).

I think my mind just exploded....

[blakegwinn]

Of course. I can imagine that the service requirement Blake talked about in his post above is the other way 'round in a white tablecloth restaurant.

We have white butcher paper, does that count? Maybe it should be that you get "white tablecloth service" if it is clean, casual service if it is drawn all over with crayons.

[DHagedorn]

In France, at a cafe, your check is brought with your dessert and coffee. You are expected to pay your bill, if not immediately, then promptly. And properly so.

Here in the provinces, a dauphin, when not a tator tot, is a one-eyed king and, blind to the difference, demands "apres moi" standards from cafes. (Twain, Borges, HG Wells, The Sun King and the recent Palena thread all in one sentence of sixteen words--beat that Farci!).

Server: "Would you care for anything else?"

Diner: "No, thank-you."

Server: "Very well." Server drops the check on a return trip to the table (so he does not give the impression that he is anxious for the guest to leave) and states the obvious: "I'll take that when you are ready."

Diner draws no inference from this completely benign statement and, when he is ready, renders payment in a way that is clearly visible to the server. If the diner is paying with cash, he hands the check presenter to the server and says either, "This is fine, thank-you" or "I will need change, please." Bibbledy-bobbledy-boo!

[DonRocks]

Bibbledy-bobbledy-boo!

It's Bippity Boppity Boo.

Cheers,

Sal Icadoola.

[DHagedorn]

It's Bippity Boppity Boo.

Cheers,

Sal Icadoola.

Now that's just goppity-goo.

[Scott Johnston]

Actually Michael, you are very wrong on this subject. Healthcare (my choosen field of incompentance) is also a business in which we deliver services before payment is required. Often we do not get complete payment for our services as well as many complaints.

Another quick thought on the subject:

I find it interesting that it is in the ONLY business where payment is NOT required before or immediately upon rendering of services/delivery of goods that the consumer has seized so intractably on his right to not be bothered to pay except for exactly how and when he wants to, and then seized so righteously on his right to indignation and complaint regarding how the provider of services handles how the consumer handles HIS (the consumer's) obligation to pay for those goods and services.

[DLB]

After you have pulled out your laptop, checked your e-mail and shown your dinner companions you pcitures of your latest trip to Greece?

I actually saw a scene like this in Vegas a few weeks ago. At Fleur De Lys, there was a couple sitting at the table looking at something on a laptop while eating dinner. I kid you not.

[demandalicious]

(Twain, Borges, HG Wells, The Sun King and the recent Palena thread all in one sentence of sixteen words--beat that Farci!).

This thread has gone from proper server etiquette to You Got Served.

[DonRocks]

This thread has gone from proper server etiquette to You Got Served.

[Agreed (and I'm guilty of straying as well (*)). Back on topic please. ]

(*) Which I always regret because it creates for work for myself.

[Mark Slater]

True story:

Guest to Maitre d': "We've been waiting a half hour for the check!"

Maitre d': "Who did you ask for the check?"

Guest: "You have to ask for the check here?"

There's a simple phrase every waiter should know : "Is there anything else I can get you?"

There are 2 answers and one of them is "Yes, the check".

[Michael Landrum]

Actually Michael, you are very wrong on this subject. Healthcare (my choosen field of incompentance) is also a business in which we deliver services before payment is required. Often we do not get complete payment for our services as well as many complaints.

Really, I have to pay my doctor before the probe, the McLean Pavillon before my vacation, and my pharmacist before I get my Vicodan. And they never get any complaints from me.

When I am bleeding from a knife wound I still have to fill out insurance forms in the ER first, don't I? No complaints here either, unless they only write up a scrip for Tylenol III--like that ever helped anyone ease their pain.

[crackers]

When it comes to extracting a decent tip out of a cheapskate, I have to admire Zora's direct "don't mess with me" approach! [not that I'm trying to start anything here....]

They had left me a $5 tip. I saw red and ran down the stairs to Bleecker Street, where the stragglers were walking up the street. I grabbed the closest guy and started screaming at him that I made $1 an hour and had busted my ass all evening and he and his friends had stiffed me. He protested mildly that he had left a tip, even if his friends hadn't. "I don't care. You cough up some money and collect from them later!" I was a mad woman. I think he pulled a ten dollar bill out of his wallet, gave it to me and ran. I know that if I had gone to the manager/maitre d' for support, he would have just laughed, and if he knew what I had done he would've fired me. I was beyond caring at that point.

I guess I am very fortunate that I neither know nor have ever encountered these types. But if not going out with them is an acceptable solution, so too is a restaurant doing whatever is necessary to make sure they are no longer welcome.

I also know some people who will start decreasing the tip as soon as they step place in the joint. "The host gave me a dirty look, thats $2 off the tip." "The busperson did not bring my water fast enough, that's another dollar" I am not joking about this , I no longer go out with these people.

[B.A.R.]

To the terribly important citzens of Washington, DC:

If you are so absorbed with your telephone call that you cannot order coffee in an expeditious manner, please move out of the line and promptly walk into traffic.

Thank you.

[Barbara]

To the terribly important citzens of Washington, DC:

If you are so absorbed with your telephone call that you cannot order coffee in an expeditious manner, please move out of the line and promptly walk into traffic.

Thank you.

The Dutch Market in Burtonsville has a sign which reads "If you are talking on a cellphone, you won't be served." Gotta love those Amish folk.

[Principia]

Does anyone remember the cartoon a few years back about the server who tried to take away the plates, and the diner turned purple, held up a knife, and started screaming "if you take that plate away, I'll cut your arm off at the elbow!" It was hilarious and I've been looking for that on the web to no avail. Can anyone send it to me?

I'm afraid I don't, but I did dine once with a friend at a team-waited establishment where they tried to take away his salad plate no fewer than five times in a 10-minute period - when he was obviously not done with it. The fifth time one of the waiters approached the table he just held his knife blade-up in front of it and stared them down until they buggered off. His original idea was to stab them with a fork, but the +1 and I talked him out of it.

[mhberk]

The Dutch Market in Burtonsville has a sign which reads "If you are talking on a cellphone, you won't be served." Gotta love those Amish folk.

I LOVE that place!! Yeah, they don't mess around there

[MeMc]

Gawker's How to Eat in a Restaurant from today. .

[mnnchas]

Is it really reasonable to refuse to seat a regular (and obvioudsly pregnant) customer when there are no seats at the bar to wait at???

Love the food here but the customer service (with notable exceptions) is innane at best.

Sigh...

Jennifer, cranky and 6 months pregnant...

i think restaurants should treat all patrons equal (regular or not)

just my two cents

[jparrott]

i think restaurants should treat all patrons equal (regular or not)

just my two cents

Maybe. But if it were my host stand, I know what I'd do. Find a chair, somewhere, and preferably at a table. Motherhood is an exalted state.

[Pat]

i think restaurants should treat all patrons equal (regular or not)

just my two cents

I would think obviously pregnant would trump regular. That's a woman who needs to sit down.

[bookluvingbabe]

But they don't treat all customers equally. They seat incomplete parties in the back all the time.

And I know they've seated Mr. BLB a few times before I've gotten there in the front.

I did eventually get a seat at the bar, after being asked to move from the first free seat because someone was waiting for a friend... Next time I'll just stand and be grumpy. Those bar stools are wicked uncomfortable.

All told, I probably stood for 10 minutes and sat uncomfortably for 10 minutes. (Trouble on the Red Line--Mr. BLB sat for 10 minutes at Dupont Circle.)

Not the end of the world but I can't think of anyplace we go with any amount of regularity that wouldn't have seated me immediately.

Firefly, Dino, 2 Amys have always seated each of us when we arrived.

We always arrive together at Citronelle but I don't think they would have made me stand (assuming a table was free.)

In the meantime, his Palena Burger craving has been fulfilled for the next little while and he keeps mumbling about Ping Pong Pizza so the next time we're in the city, I know what we're doing...

[Seeker]

Gawker's How to Eat in a Restaurant from today. .

Like it mostly . . . But, as for stumping the waiter, I am a bit at a loss.

Is it unreasonable to expect the server to be familiar with the food at the restaurant where they work?

I learn something new every day. Some days it's at a restaurant where I inquire about the menu.

[blakegwinn]

Like it mostly . . . But, as for stumping the waiter, I am a bit at a loss.

Is it unreasonable to expect the server to be familiar with the food at the restaurant where they work?

I learn something new every day. Some days it's at a restaurant where I inquire about the menu.

He is right on some of this stuff I guess but he still sounds like a bitter asshole to me. One of the reasons I work at a rest. is to talk about food and the dishes. I make recommendations all the time. And for the nice customers and a lot of the regulars I warn them if something wasn't looking great that night, like sometimes one of the staff had the mussells preshift or somthing and they weren't at the top of their game. Or the new guy making the pasta dishes doesn't seem to have it yet. (Another reason to be nice to your servers!!) I definitely don't mind answering questions about ingredients. Is every diner supposed to know the subtle differences between two different oyster beds in the same area now? I might go home and google it also but I would like to have SOME idea before I plunk down 30 bucks for a dish. Humbug on the guy who wrote this.

[Pat]

Like it mostly . . . But, as for stumping the waiter, I am a bit at a loss.

Is it unreasonable to expect the server to be familiar with the food at the restaurant where they work?

I learn something new every day. Some days it's at a restaurant where I inquire about the menu.

If I'm in a restaurant where I would feel embarrassed to ask what certain terms on the menu mean, I'm probably not very comfortable being in that restaurant. I don't know that I'd be asking the distinctions between particular types of oysters, but sometimes there are terms I either don't know or am vaguely familiar with that I will ask my server to explain. If that means I'm not good enough to be there, I guess I don't have to go there.